Washington Initiative for Boys and Men loves highlighting stories about men’s positive contributions to their families and their communities. Such stories are included under the category “Empathy for Boys and Men“, one of the three topic categories for our content.
The story below recounts an amazing series of events experienced by a Seattle-area man and his family. Some names were changed to preserve privacy. We thank ‘Michael’ for allowing us to tell his story.
Intro
Flipping through medical records without permission is frowned upon, to say the least. And hospital nurses’ stations are off-limits to those who aren’t medical staff. If you are Michael Sheraton, and you’re desperate to save your wife, the rules be damned.
It was a Friday at 10pm. Michael sat outside Jen’s hospital room in Seattle, agonizing over a four-inch thick stack of medical records. He prayed for a miracle.
The place was silent.
Suddenly, a female voice called out, “Hey, you’re not supposed to be there. Who are you, and what are you doing?”
1.
It was a mild insect bite that triggered the first sign something was seriously wrong with Michael’s wife.
Most insect bites are harmless, but this one above Jen’s right ankle led to an outbreak of cellulitis. The swelling spread so rapidly that it was cutting off circulation to her foot. When a family friend with a nursing background noticed black-and-blue splotching, she insisted Jen get to the hospital immediately. By the time Jen was stabilized, she had lost a large chunk of flesh off the top of her foot.
A short time later, their family doctor noticed something was awry with Jen’s vital signs. Her pulse was racing. She had no appetite. She was frequently disoriented. Her moods were erratic.
This doctor was the first in what would become a line of doctors to give up on determining a proper diagnosis for Jen. He lacked the necessary expertise, especially as Jen’s mind started slipping.
Jen became obstinate, argumentative, lost her sense of humor, and couldn’t remember what day it was. She displayed personality traits totally opposite her normal self. She resembled someone having a severe bipolar episode…or sliding into insanity.
2.
Jen was admitted to Seattle’s Providence Hospital, the same place she’d given birth to their three sons. Michael and the boys outfitted her hospital room with rosaries, statues of Mary, and other articles of their Catholic faith.
Jen’s mental capacity was spiraling. She no longer recognized her husband. On one occasion she told Michael that she didn’t know who he was…but she knew he was having an affair with the nurse!
Jen’s medical care was turned over to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist told Michael that because he was Jen’s primary care physician, he had full authority to label her as unfit for parenthood. In that case, he would recommend she be committed to a mental institution, and Michael would not be allowed to bring her home.
Jen had been refusing to take her anti-psychotic medications.
A point arrived at which the psychiatrist gave an ultimatum: if another hour passed without Jen taking the pills, he would admit her to institutional care.
The psychiatrist had already been clear about his distaste for the family’s religious faith, and as he left Jen’s room, he added, “Let’s see if your prayers work now.”
3.
Michael was facing the dreadful prospect of his wife being institutionalized. Her health was deteriorating, and her lab results were confounding the doctors. He kneeled next to Jen’s bed, and he prayed for God to intervene.
What he experienced next was unlike anything he’d experienced before.
Head bowed in prayer, Michael’s body shook. He felt hot tears flowing down his cheeks. He petitioned Saint Anthony directly for a miracle to save his wife and keep her with their family. He asked that Jen would take her medicine immediately so he could tell the doctor they were complying with his order.
With all options exhausted, and yet with deep faith that his wife would be saved, Michael felt his prayer rise in the room.
He stood up.
He extended his hand to Jen, offering her the pills. In a moment of absolute clarity, she said okay — and swallowed them.
It soon became apparent, however, that the anti-psychotic drugs were ineffective. Furthermore, there was concern that the medications would be too strong for Eve to tolerate. Eve was Jen and Michael’s unborn daughter, inside Jen’s womb.
4.
During the unfolding health crisis, relatives helped care for Jen and Michael’s three kids, who were ages 7, 5, and 3. Jen’s eight sisters rotated in and out of town to pitch in, and neighbors and church friends brought so many meals that Michael had to purchase an extra freezer.
Another week went by with occasional visits from doctors who still didn’t know what was wrong with Jen. One of their theories was mad cow disease. Had Jen visited England recently? Nope. She’d been in Renton, mostly.
At one point during her delusional state, Jen was convinced people were manipulating the clock in a conspiracy to confuse her. She rose from bed, snatched the clock off the wall, and ran down the hallway. Michael couldn’t help but laugh at his wife. Her gown unfastened in the back, she was exposing herself to the east wing of Providence Hospital. They chased her down, but her delusions would not abate.
Michael saw that the doctors were running out of ideas. And they seemed to be giving up.
5.
It was late one Friday evening and Michael sat in the nurses’ station outside Jen’s hospital room, agonizing over pages and pages of medical records. He again prayed for a miracle.
The place was silent.
A female voice called out, “Hey, you’re not supposed to be there. Who are you, and what are you doing?”
Michael offered the woman a brief, solemn explanation.
“Get out of the way, and give me those,” she responded. She sat quietly and read the files.
Then she turned to Michael and said, “Your wife has an autoimmune disease,” followed by, “Oh my gosh…and she’s pregnant!”
The woman shook Michael’s hand and introduced herself as Dr. Peggy Hutchinson.
“Why are you here?” Michael asked. “I don’t really know,” she said. She seldom came to this wing of the hospital, especially this late at night.
Michael explained that he had just been praying to Saint Anthony, and she was the answer to his prayer.
Dr. Peggy replied, “My patron saint is Saint Anthony.”
6.
Dr. Peggy had concluded after ten minutes of reading Jen’s files what two months of doctors’ evaluations had missed: Jen had an autoimmune disease.
An autoimmune disease causes one’s immune system to attack healthy organs and tissues. Flare-ups can be deadly. Jen was experiencing a major flare-up, and doctors needed to calm it right away or else she would likely die. Michael felt astonished by Dr. Peggy’s quick thinking and decisive actions as she coordinated Jen’s transfer to the Intensive Care Unit at Swedish Hospital.
Michael had new hope for Jen’s survival.
Typically doctors would employ chemotherapy to stifle out-of-control immune systems. With a baby in the womb, however, their only safe option was to administer extremely high doses of prednisone, a steroid that suppresses the immune system and decreases inflammation.
When a rheumatologist named Dr. Peter Mohai joined Jen’s care team at Swedish, he offered a proper diagnosis: Jen had lupus. Lupus is a disease that mostly strikes women, particularly women of childbearing age. Dr. Peter was an expert on treating lupus, but a pregnant lupus patient presented special challenges.
7.
Now three months into Jen’s health crisis, Michael was running on fumes.
He was invited into a large conference room with ten doctors seated around a long table. The doctors explained that after looking at all the options, aborting the fetus was the only solution for sparing Jen’s life.
Michael felt surprisingly calm.
Hundreds of people were praying for his family, including relatives, friends of friends, church members near and far, and even a convent of nuns all the way in Australia. The abortion recommendation was just another hurdle to get over that day. He felt complete assurance that God’s will would be done.
Michael stood up, looked around the table, and said:
We are dealing with two souls, and you cannot say one is more important than the other. We live in one of the most advanced medical communities in the world. You are going to figure out how to save both my wife and my child. I know you can do it.
Then he walked out of the room.
Afterward, one of the doctors found Michael in the hallway. She was a high-risk pregnancy specialist, and she was angry. She chastised him for getting his wife pregnant. She strongly suggested he schedule a vasectomy. This doctor’s judgement was clear: Michael was a bad man and a bad husband, and his family certainly did not need any more children.
8.
Lupus is Latin for ‘wolf’, and it is an insidious and unpredictable disease when it flares up.
Lupus in Jen’s brain was the cause of her delusions. It had attacked her vascular system and her kidneys, and now it was inflaming her heart. Jen would ultimately receive a total of eight full blood transfusions during this time.
Lupus was systematically destroying Jen’s body. Doctors told Michael they didn’t have a solution. His wife was dying.
9.
During this time, Michael brought Jen communion as often as he could.
On one occasions, Jen was very weak, and doctors were preparing for an ultrasound scan of her heart. Michael asked for some time alone with her first.
Michael held up a small piece of communion bread. It was still too large for Jen to handle, so he broke off a smaller piece. They prayed together, and he inserted the body of Christ into her mouth. Michael continued praying as doctors wheeled her away.
When Jen returned from the ultrasound, Michael hardly recognized her. She was glowing. The nurse said the scan showed her heart was normal. They could not explain why.
10.
Doctors chose the day of October 16 to induce labor and bring Eve into the world. Jen’s vital signs had plummeted again, and she had toxemia. It was time for Eve to join the family.
Michael was aware that the relics of a Catholic saint, Saint Therese of Lisieux, were on tour in Seattle at the time. He chose Therese to be Eve’s middle name.
Eve was born two and a half months premature. She weighed 1.8 pounds and fit in the palm of Michael’s hand. In the Swedish Hospital Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, a nurse suggested Michael slide his wedding ring over Eve’s hand and dangle it from her elbow, to capture how truly tiny she was. They fed her with a syringe, like a baby bird.
After three months in the NICU, Eve, Jen, and Michael went home.
Ending
These events took place in 1997. Twenty-four years later, Eve is in the process of discerning entry into the Carmelite order of nuns — the same order as Saint Therese of Lisieux. Michael does not call this part a miracle. It was God’s plan from the beginning.
Reflecting back on that difficult time, Michael says:
My love for my wife was revealed through suffering and watching her battle lupus. My love for her grew exponentially. I realized that love is not an emotion; it is an act of the will.
With Jen and Eve in good health all these years later, and Eve soon to enter religious life, Michael plans to reconnect with Dr. Peggy. He wants to bring her some good news.
