Washington Initiative for Boys and Men founder Blair Daly was interviewed for the 2021 International Conference on Men’s Issues held in December. The 40-minute interview was initially accessible only to conference attendees. Now it’s available on YouTube.
Beneath the video, we’ve provided an edited transcript of a small portion of the interview.
(From Blair…) I first attended the International Conference on Men’s Issues in 2019 and found it to be an uplifting, well-organized three days of camaraderie and fascinating presentations. That year it was hosted at a Sheraton Hotel in Chicago. The hotel — to their credit — resisted pressure from people who wanted the event cancelled. At that time I’d very recently become aware that boys and men experience inequality and discrimination. To be an invited presenter for the 2021 International Conference on Men’s Issues was truly a neat honor, and I’m pleased with the end product. Give the interview a watch!
Interview Excerpt: ‘Describe your approach’
Vernon Meigs: Can you describe the approach you take with your advocacy?
Blair Daly: I don’t try to intentionally antagonize anyone, but I also insist on telling the truth. Sometimes it’s a fine line.
For example, when I come across instances of anti-male bias, prejudice, or discrimination perpetrated by local politicians or leaders, I think carefully about how to go about exposing those stories.
One approach I could take is to react with anger, writing a scathing headline that ‘calls them out’. After all, they’re being sexist and they deserve to be shamed, right?
I tend not to do that.
Instead, I think: Ya know what, let me be patient. I bet I’ll have an opportunity to write a story and ‘get content out of this’. But what’s more important is to make a real-world impact. So I start by calling the person, or emailing them, and seeing if I can have a conversation with them to clarify what they meant when they said that seemingly sexist thing, or when they praised that discriminatory program or policy. Let me get to the bottom of whether they are really that blatantly anti-male. Did I misunderstand what they meant? Even if I understood it correctly, if I give them an opportunity to demonstrate empathy for males, might they do so? Then the story I eventually write could have a positive spin to it, rather than being just another piece of bad news. Plus, maybe it turned out I was able to get through to somebody and change their perspective a bit.
See related: KING 5 News takes new gender-inclusive approach to coverage of victimized Indigenous people
Image matters
Blair Daly: I’m conscious of avoiding being perceived as angry or bitter. Unfortunately, we advocates for boys and men are sometimes painted that way. And sometimes that’s fair. There are those among us who, frankly, can make us look bad. And I really empathize with a lot of those guys. They’ve been through major hardships.
But ultimately it is on each one of us to get the help we need to recover from those hardships, to heal, to get to a place of emotional maturity about the suffering we’ve experienced. If we’re going to try to make a positive difference in the real world, to make a real impact — rather than only being a blogger or podcaster behind a computer screen, preaching to the choir — then we have to be strategic about what we communicate, and how we communicate it.
We need to consider whether we’re making our movement look attractive or repulsive. We need to be capable of having calm, sophisticated conversations with people who initially have little understanding of or interest in male issues, but who might be open-minded to becoming our allies — if we approach things with them strategically.
